Be Strong! Emotionally!

One thing I see with many Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu students is that they are very athletic, fast and physically gifted.  On the other hand, I also see a lot of people who, while they exercise and pump iron are emotionally weak.   These are the guys who get mad when they perceive a slight by somebody or feel disrespected in their own minds by something someone said or did off hand.  Their peacock feathers flair.

These guys are also the predominate “Drama queens” of the school worrying about the perceived social order of the school and how they fit in. They may also get angry or frustrated when they lose a match and storm off the mat causing embarrassment to their partner and the rest of school with their antics. 

I think one of the main reasons Jiu-Jitsu is so good for the soul is because if you are one of these people I mentioned, Jiu-Jitsu will beat you down so much with loss (if you train with better people and don't duck others) that you either become emotionally strong or you quit training.  I rarely ever see a brown belt or above (at least in my circles) who isn’t emotionally steady.  They know full well that, while they are good they are one tap away from being on the wrong end of things ESPECIALLY at tournaments. 

Being strong emotionally is important for Jiu-Jitsu but it’s also important for life.  I too have had hands dealt to me in life that brought me to my knees emotionally.  You need to get back up as a warrior and overcome the obstacles that life hands you.  It makes you a better person and it also gives your family and friends more confidence in you.

As a fairly well known Jiu-Jitsu practitioner I have been called every name in the book.   Many people are just plain nasty too.  People have made fun of my looks, my voice, my techniques, my weight, my instructor, my association, the fact I practice Gracie Jiu-Jitsu, the fact I practice Jiu-jitsu at all, my stand-up black belts,  my school, my schools name, my name, my cars, my house, my students, my face book page, my blog, my clothes, my gi’s, my music, my hobbies, my humor, my coaching, my teaching , my politics, my age, my ethnicity, my country, my patriotism, my hair It’s ok. 

If you truly believe that everyone HAS to like you in life then you are in for a world of hurt, my friend.  Hell, my kids don’t even like me many times.  There are even going to be people who act like your friend who secretly hate you and want to see you fail! 

Accept it, it’s part of being a warrior, not in the physical sense of being a warrior but a warrior against life’s struggles, which is just as important.  The funny part is NOT VERY MANY people have ever said anything to my face =).  Lastly, Don’t even think about becoming well known in your field if you can’t handle criticism. Let the flood gates of ill will open up.  So toughen your emotional warrior!

I would like to leave you with this quote: The Japanese have a saying “The nail that sticks up, gets hammered down.”  I always like to think of myself as the nail that gives the hammer the middle finger as I’m getting hammered. =)

P.S. If this post somehow hurt your feelings because you saw yourself in it…then re-read it one more time and follow the advice...lol

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